are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
