Why are handjobs necessary in class?
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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