Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize