I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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