Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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