I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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