I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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