I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Randomize
