my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize