Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
