why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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