Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
