Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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