I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize