they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Randomize
