I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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