it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
