I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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