and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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