Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
