Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
