You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
