Three words: puerto rican gang bang
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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