Texts From Last Night

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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...

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  (307): try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip... http://tfl.nu/dmfu
  Replies (25) Good night (5251) Bad night (1096)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.

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  (402): just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot. http://tfl.nu/9z8d
  Replies (24) Good night (4607) Bad night (864)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.

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  (507): We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night. http://tfl.nu/sjq5
  Replies (5) Good night (4691) Bad night (798)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"

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  (267): I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant" http://tfl.nu/lcyo
  Replies (27) Good night (1153) Bad night (5173)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.

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  (205): Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high. http://tfl.nu/wyb4
  Replies (15) Good night (5126) Bad night (1068)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song

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  (918): 3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song http://tfl.nu/o6l8
  Replies (6) Good night (2631) Bad night (1187)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears

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  (505): the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears http://tfl.nu/h30c
  Replies (21) Good night (7447) Bad night (1032)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy

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  (416): Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy http://tfl.nu/lckr
  Replies (15) Good night (1839) Bad night (1144)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?

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  (360): Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident? http://tfl.nu/46ya
  Replies (16) Good night (3334) Bad night (2164)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.

  (847): View more from Illinois

  You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.

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  (847): That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy. (847): You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth. http://tfl.nu/gv40
  Replies (12) Good night (2105) Bad night (762)
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  (831): View more from California

  Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...

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  (831): Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone... http://tfl.nu/6t56
  Replies (2) Good night (1011) Bad night (581)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual

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  (630): Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual http://tfl.nu/4rhk
  Replies (1) Good night (930) Bad night (456)
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  (936): View more from Texas

  I AM VODKA MAN

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  (936): I AM VODKA MAN http://tfl.nu/r5if
  Replies (5) Good night (816) Bad night (447)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!

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  (443): Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch! http://tfl.nu/w5ox
  Replies (2) Good night (647) Bad night (355)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.

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  (651): Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up. http://tfl.nu/p8h2
  Replies (1) Good night (676) Bad night (327)

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