Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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