belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
