Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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