I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Randomize