let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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