Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(702): View more from Nevada

The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before

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(702): The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before http://tfl.nu/ogqr

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(402): View more from Nebraska

i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.

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(402): i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more. http://tfl.nu/blv6

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha

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(717): I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha http://tfl.nu/f9u5

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(630): View more from Illinois

I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.

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(630): I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted. http://tfl.nu/87dj

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(417): View more from Missouri

And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?

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(417): And my fence, why is part of it on the roof? http://tfl.nu/v3wp

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(305): View more from Florida

If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.

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(305): If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls. http://tfl.nu/m95d

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(480): View more from Arizona

Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.

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(480): Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby. http://tfl.nu/ip7w

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(970): View more from Colorado

We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later

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(970): We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later http://tfl.nu/sax8

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(903): View more from Texas

best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.

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(903): best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them. http://tfl.nu/kc67

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(314): View more from Missouri

I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.

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(314): I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again. http://tfl.nu/qrkv

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(727): View more from Florida

We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.

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(727): We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol. http://tfl.nu/xk91

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(914): View more from New York

Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious

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(914): Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious http://tfl.nu/b9mo

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(847): View more from Illinois

Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window

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(847): Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window http://tfl.nu/ubwd

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.

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(202): A big toe in my vag is not foreplay. http://tfl.nu/p4zv

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(330): View more from Ohio

listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.

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(330): listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life. http://tfl.nu/0xlf

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