You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Randomize
