About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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