I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
honey bunches of taint.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
What drink are we having for lunch?
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
