Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
It's shark week go big or go home
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
