At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
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