Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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