That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
