I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
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