you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize