Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
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