I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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