I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.