I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize