oh god the rape fog is back!
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I am one with the molecules
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
