Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize