How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
