Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
