I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
There r osticjed everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
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