Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
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