I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
he was CRYING into my vagina
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
