Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
We're not piercing ourselves today.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
