i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
